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The Old Lands Beckon.

For my pathfinder game tomorrow, a note from a cousin, giving some tiny hints of what's to come...



The Old lands Beckon, finagle and ask you personal questions.

A reconnaissance report, composed by Raymond, for the perusal of Cousin Slash AKA The Terror Of the High Seas:

Slash, old plum, well as you may or not have realized what with you having been turned human, and now perhaps Deevil, or Demon, with those horns, Do ye have a tail yet? Too personal, right? Straight on to  my probably unexpected report. I’m not even sure if you know where I have just escaped from, or whether you knew I had need to be making “escapes.” Well there is nary a lock I cain’t open given half minute or so. These odd fellows had me all trussed up like a christmas turkey, gagged and bound with simple knotted hemp.

When I realized there was no breakfast beer coming my way, I loosened the old ropes and wandered out of the odd sort of shiny metal cell they had me in. there was some kind of magic on the old door, but I haves a knack for it, so open old sesame, and out I strolls hugging the wall stayin low on the look up for big un’s. No one came by, I did a circuit of the ship, I realized when we banked hard left, I were in some sort of flyin ship, no water moves you like that, nor does your centre of gravity keep you walking straight on the choppy turn in the sea.

I am pretty sure you saw that 4 armed scallywag, and his weirdo crew, there were more of the same on his ship. I gave them a poke in the ribs with me old dogslicer, and made my way to what I hoped was the deck. I opened a porthole, and looked out, I was standing on the top of what could only be describe as a flying plate, like the kind yer mom used to serve her one fancy teacup upon. We were only skimming the lands, desert it seemed, or a very long beach. I jumped for it, nigh a prison, can hold old lucky Ray. I tucked a rolled, scraped myself up a bit, but got up and right away cursed myself for not finding a waterskin on board to bring along. 

I walked back the opposite the direction that I reckoned we had been flying, I hain’t never been in a desert so wide, couldn’t be a beach I was saying to myself. (like you did as a lad, Slash, I talk to myself, as much as to actual folk; sometimes in the third person, and definitely in my sleep). Eventually I came to what I have heard called an Oasis, though as I fell down next to the feet of an elegantly clad campfire illuminated Hobgoblin Woman, into an exhausted sleep, it could have been what they called a mirage. What would a Hobgoblin Lady be doin out in this desert?

Turns out that she was in fact real, and she’s a grand lady at that, once you get past the Hobgoblinness of her features, her charm makes you want to follow her to the ends of the earth, which my cousin, is what I have undertook. It turns, it does, out, that you and she have similar purpose to convoy with the dragons, on behalf of some giants. She is a Shaman and Archmage of legendary tales (supposedly, here in the Old Lands, I am in the Old Lands my cousin!) Apparently The Lady Vivaline’s Party saw my daring leap from what they also called a ‘flying saucer’. I am not sure why she is working on behalf of the Stone Giants, but she has their seals, and letters, like those you have from the Frosties, all making treaty and truce like with the Dragons. She says that we are likely the only emissaries going overland to meet the Dragons. 

The weather, the monsters, and Evils are great above ground than in the tunnels that run all under the old lands, but it is more expedient, and she seems to love making haste, we have been travelling 3 days, and this is the first ‘town’ (very much the one donkey variety) we have come to, and the general store owner (one of 6 residents) has promised to send the letter via the teleportal he has in his basement (handy thing to know that there is a Teleportal in the ruins of the Crystal city) to get this missive to you asap. 

So far, the weather has been brutally hot, but we haven’t faced any of the sandstorms, rains of frogs, demons, mind flares Ogre berserkers, and undead armies that everyone says are coming our way. We did slaughter several “Dinosaurs”: creatures I thought were some sort of Land Dragons, on first glance, that first day out. They came out of the sand like snakes. I have never seen the like. I am making a dagger of one of the beastie’s teeth that weren’t rotted.

We are making for the fabled City that still stands, people just call it ‘The City,’ but that is the full name, home to many thousands of Elves, Aasimar, and other ‘old races.’ All the tunnels, if you choose to go that route, and all the overland trade routes for that matter) go through the City, so we could meet up to combine our purposes. In my group, there is The Lady Vivaline, a Hobgob Aristo and powerful mage, myself; halfling master trapsmith, escaper of prisons, The Invincible Orc Barbarian, and the Lady’s “personal guard” *nudge nudge wink wink*, Grangnard, and my new best pal, Merle Oberall, who is akin to a Ranger, except that he hunts in sewers, and alleys of great cities. 

He’s kind of out of luck til we get to “the City,” everyone jokes! Merle is easily the only one I’d turn my back on if I were ever to do such a foolish un-halfling like thing, for some reason. the Lady has a pretty but fierce Faerie Dragon as her familiar. it gets her a bit too much unwanted attention in these parts, I am told, so often the poor fell is disguised as a handmaiden. maybe that’s why he bites so fricking hard.


I don’t have much intel, other than some names and creatures to be wary and cautious of, on your journey. Garehardt the Slayer, The Oracle of The Beach (my group lost two members trying to get past the oracle, but they won’t tell me more than that.) apparently there is an evil dwarf and a Aasimar Paladin having some sort of great chase of each across the desert, many folk have got in their way and paid the ultimate price. “Be wary of freaky extremists” is the motto of my side of the family, you know. I hope to see you in “The City” maybe even before. I have told the lady all about you, so it’s all good, yours in thievery, Cousin Raymond, the Lucky.

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